Someone appended the comments below to the original Dave Barry article when it was forwarded to me...and these REALLY had me laughing out loud!
A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:
- "Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!"
- "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"
- "Can you hear me NOW?"
- "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"
- "You know, in Arkansas , we're now legally married.'"
- "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"
- "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."
- "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"
- "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!"
- "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."
- 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"
- "God, now I know why I am not gay."
"Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?"