"I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings!"

R.I.P. Maya Angelou!   You will be missed, more than you could ever imagine!

CT DMV - In & Out in 20 Minutes!!!

Ugh!   The Connecticut DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles).   I was expecting the worst.   Who doesn't when it comes to ANY DMV!!!

Why would anyone want to actually go to the DMV in any state?   Well...given my latest medical escapade (and perhaps the thought of getting a handicapped parking permit) and the need for local beach stickers, I had no other choice.   To get the beach stickers, my town required current copies of our "vehicle registration certificates" which were no where to be found.   You're supposed to keep the certificates in the vehicle along with the insurance card and other stuff...but none of it was there!   But I digress.

So, expecting the worst, I headed off to one of Connecticut's local DMV offices.   As I approached, it appeared as though every car in the state of Connecticut was in the parking lot.   I was about to turn around and go home...but decided to stick it out!

11:20AM
I get on the "information line".   There are at least 15 folks ahead of me.
I'm with a cane and me knees are killing me!

11:32AM
I approach a clerk and tell her I would like to get a temporary handicapped permit and registration replacements (to get my beach stickers).   I'm given a ticket numbered E921.   Wow...that was quick...only 12 minutes on the "information line"!   The clerk asks that I not go too far away, because my number (E921) would be called soon!   Sure...I say to myself...but I'm still in a state of shock over the 12 minutes!   I look around and there are 100+ people here!   I find a seat and within a minute or two...my number E921 is called!   I almost fell off the chair.   It must have been the cane and the request for a handicapped sticker!

As instructed, I go to window #14 (there are over 20+ windows).   I'm greeted by a very friendly and cordial DMV employee who appears to be happy to assist me.   Is this the DMV?

11:40
I exited the DMV with handicapped permit and certified registrations in hand.   As I'm leaving, I see all of the folks who were on the information line (ahead of me) still waiting for their number to be called!   I'm still in a state of shock.

Postcript:
If you ever need to go to a Connecticut DMV office...it's always a plus if you're somehow incapacited.   If so...they may give you a number that begins with the letter "E"!   I think it means "express" or "expedite" or something!   But it is good!   If, on the other hand, you're going for beach stickers....fuhgeddaboudit!

#bringbackourgirls???

Bring Back our Country?   Bring it back from where?   To whom Ms.Coulter?   Dubya?

Happy in Iran...but the Government ain't!

"About a month ago, 6 Iranian boys and girls (in this video) danced to the famous song by Pharrell Williams called "Happy" on the rooftops of Tehran and uploaded their video on the YouTube.   It was widely distributed in the social media.   The police decided to track them down and arrest them and make them repent in front of the camera.   It then showed this capture on the national TV channels as a bunch of deceived Iranian youth who regretted their deed.   In the past 35 years, Islamic Republic has managed to steal freedom and happiness from the Iranian youth and replace it with a culture full of mourning and sorrow.   We, too, are human.   We, too, have the right to be happy and live happily and learn how to be happy."

Latest update here.
Six Iranians arrested for appearing in a video singing along to an American pop song were released on Wednesday, one day after being detained for what police called their "obscene" behaviour, one of them said in an online posting.

Mitch McConnell...Weakest Victory in 75 Years!!!

"The 60% won by Mitch McConnell Tuesday is the lowest support registered by a sitting Kentucky U.S. Senator from either party since 1938…On the Democratic side Tuesday, Alison Lundergan Grimes had one of the best primary performances by a non-incumbent Kentucky U.S. Senate candidate over the last 60 years."  
SOURCE

OK...let's not pop the champagne just yet!   But, if Ms. Alison Grimes wins in November...I will get so drunk!   Tears will flow!   I will begin to think that even the folks in Kentucky get it!

PS...Mrs. McConnell...aka, Elaine Chao, was Secretary of Labor under Dubya's regime!   Hundreds of thousands of jobs were lost back then...but nobody's asking!!!

Jamaican Me Happy!

Happy Mother's Day & 40th too!

Happy Mother's Day to my wife and the mother of our two wonderful daughters.   Today marks our 40th wedding anniversary and you are still the "sunshine of my life"!

Much luv...Me!

"Hello...this is American Airlines..."

Thursday, May 8th around noon:

Phone rings.   I don't pick up.   Automatically switches over to our answering machine.

"Hello.   This is American Airlines calling with a flight update.   Unfortunately, American Airlines flight #101 from London's Heathrow to New York's John F. Kennedy International Airport is now expected to depart at 11:00am and due to arrive at JFK at 2:15pm.   This call may be recorded."

WTF?   Must be a wrong number?

Around 5:00pm my youngest daughter shows up with our grandson in tow.   As is often the case, he likes to sneak up the stairs and jump into the kitchen and yell...SURPRISE!   Thursday was no exception.   However, a few seconds later, someone else yelled surprise!

Who you might ask?   It was my oldest daughter (who resides in London...DUH)!   She and her sister had planned this surprise over the course of the last week or so!   Needless to say, my wife and I were in a state of shock!   Hugs & kisses and yes...a few tears flowed!

Why the surprise visit?

• My wife (her mother) just retired.
• I had just been released from the hospital after knee surgery.
• Mother's Day!
• Our 40th wedding anniversary!   Just happened to fall on Mother's Day this year!

I should have pissed in the sink!

It all happened two weeks ago today.

Tuesday, April 22nd: The urination started about 2AM and repeated every hour on the hour until 8AM!   Around 10:30 I managed to make it downstairs and take a seat at the kitchen table.   About an hour later, I began to shiver...uncontrollably.   Having been denied a decent night's sleep, I returned to the bedroom.   On the way up, I noticed my right knee was a little swollen.   Got into bed and immediately fell asleep.

I woke up around 2PM with an urge to urinate.  I managed to get out of the bed and made my way to the toilet.   There a two ways to get to the toilet.   Directly from the bedroom, past a small area that contains my wife's sink and make-up area and then through another door to the other part of the bathroom that contains a walk-in shower, my sink and the toilet!   This is the path I choose!

(Far left door opening in the above photo.)   I passed my wife's sink, went through the second door and made it to the toilet.

That's the good news!   The bad news is not ALL of the urine made it into the toilet.   I made it back to the bedroom; changed underpants and crawled back into bed!   Two hours later...the same thing happened!   I followed the same path/routine!   Made it to the toilet...but, once again, I misfired and some of the urine made it into the toilet, but not all of it!

Now it was a three-peat.   This time I decided to take the alternate route!   Go through the bedroom door closest to me (opened door on the right in the photo above), and go out into (and down) the hallway... directly into the commode area of our bathroom.   I passed my sink and within 3 or 4 steps would be at the infamous toilet.   Unfortunately, Mother Nature had other plans.

I never made it.   I wound up peeing on myself and all over the bathroom floor!   In the midst of all this I was still determined to get to the damn toilet.   I still struggled to get the damn underpants off.   During that struggle, I fell. I hit the already swollen right knee, hip, rib cage and head!   As I lay there, I thought of the infamous commercial..."I've fallen, but I can't get up"!   I couldn't  About 45 minutes later, struggling on my back, I was able to make it back to the bedroom!   That's when I thought to myself...why didn't you just piss in the sink!

Soon thereafter, my wife returned home from work and my daughter happened to stop by.   It was now about 5pm and both the ladies insisted I that go to the local emergency room.   I insisted otherwise and was very stubborn in my position.   I did agree to see my internist the next day, and they settled for that because they knew I wasn't going anywhere!

Wednesday, April 23rd: Called my internist and made an appointment for 2:15pm.   Asked if he had x-ray capability at his new facility (yes) and could he have someone meet me with a wheelchair.   I was dumb enough (stubborn) to think I could drive myself.   My daughter convince me otherwise!   Once in his office, the doctor asked the nurses to help me disrobe.   It was painful!   Shortly thereafter, he entered the exam room and performed the usual "vital signs" stuff.   He called the nurses back in to help me get dressed.

"But Doc, what about the x-rays"?   "Get dressed first and we'll talk about the x-rays later"!

Once dressed, the doctor returns to the exam room and tells me the x-rays will be done, but at the local hospital.   "WHAT"?   I ask how long will I be there?   "A couple of hours" I ask.   His response..."no...a couple of days"!!!   His preliminary prognosis was a potential urinary tract infection.

Admitted via the emergency room around 4:30pm.   I was asked a thousand questions.   Two doctor's assistants enter the room and tell me they will be extracting fluids from my right knee.   The needles look to be the size of knitting needles!!!   At 10:00pm I'm rolled into my room!

Thursday, April 24th:

My 15 year old attending physician enters the room.   Takes my vitals, wants to ensure I'm comfortable, etc.   I'm bed-ridden all day and later learn that the staff, unbeknownst to my physician, refers to him as "Doogie Howser".   Dougie returns later that afternoon.   Based on the fluids extracted from my knee, he informs me that I have septic arthritis.

“Septic arthritis is an intensely painful infection in a joint.   The joint can become infected with germs that travel through your bloodstream from another part of your body.   Septic arthritis can also occur when a penetrating injury brings germs directly into the joint.” 

The bacterial culprit behind all of this is something called ‘Streptococcus pyogenes”.   After about an hour or so googling "Streptococcus pyogenes” (yes the hospital had Wifi), and I quickly realized that one needed an advanced degree in micro biology or something similar to even begin to understand the returns from google!
Then I stumbled across this article in language I could understand!

“Streptococcus pyogenes is not a bacteria that should be taken lightly.   Many people carry the bacteria without incident, however it has the potential to cause both mild and severe diseases.   Streptococcus pyogenes has claimed many lives, including that of Muppet's creator, Jim Henson.   While most people will only suffer from mild infections, such as strep throat or impetigo during childhood, it is important to understand it's full pathogenic potential to understand how to identify, treat, and avoid these infections.”

Friday, April 25th:
Dougie returns and introduces me to his 18 year old partner in crime.   He’s the orthopaedic surgeon!   Are they recruiting these kids straight out of high school?   Surgeon recommends arthroscopic surgery and schedules it for later that afternoon!   I don’t remember the rest of that day!

Saturday, April 26th:
Surgeon returns; checks my vitals and introduces me to his teenage cohort (an internal disease specialist…IDS).   They check the drainage tube inserted into my knee to ensure everything is draining as planned.

Monday, April 28th:
IDS returns to check my vitals and removes my knee bandages.   She tells me I will be discharged the next day and will need to return to the hospital for two to three weeks of antibiotic IV infusions!   The infusions will require a PICC line?

Tuesday, April 29th:
Enter Laverne & Shirley!   Laverne has been with the hospital for 35 years and Shirley has been a nurse for 27 years!   They were both delightful and assured me they wouldn’t inflict any undo pain…and they kept to their word!

PICC in place in my upper right arm.   Notice I didn’t say bicep.   There was a bicep there years and years ago.   I checked out of White Plains Hospital around mid-afternoon.

Epilog:
Twenty-twenty hindsight…it’s probably a good thing I didn’t pee in the sink!   Why?   I probably would have delayed going to the doctor!   And who knows…I could have wound up like Jim Henson!   Dead!

Good news!   I walked around today (May 10th) without the help of a walker!!!

Sarah Palin: Jesus advocated for death penalty!

Sarah Palin claimed that Jesus Christ advocated for the death penalty his entire life until his final day on Earth.

In an interview with Fox News, the former Alaskan governor was asked how she reconciles her support for the death penalty with her Christian faith, particularly in light of the recent botched execution of a death row inmate in Oklahoma.

She surprised Fox and Friends hosts Steve Doocy and Elisabeth Hasselbeck by saying that her position is inspired from Jesus' own stance in biblical times.

"I know the liberals hate it when you start mentioning the Bible," she told the pair, "but the truth is Jesus fought for the death penalty until the day he died. He was a tireless advocate of being tough on crime and making sure the criminals can't be out there raping and murdering people.

"In ancient Jerusalem crime was rampant. The Romans and their pagan morality wouldn't allow the proper punishment wrongdoers deserve. So Jesus lobbied for capital punishment in order to protect the Christians and the Jews from the Palestinians and other Muslims who were killing people left and right.

"Unfortunately Jesus' ideas were never implemented and the Roman Empire fell as result. But here in America we've always followed Jesus' advice on the death penalty, and that's why we have the lowest crime rate in the world."

Lindsey Graham: Scumbags in the White House!

Our Democratic friends, for the most part, have been in the tank over Benghazi.   Some guy said this about me yesterday on the left: The only reason I cared about this was because I have six Tea Party opponents.   Well, if that’s true, I’m the biggest scumbag in America.   I don’t think that’s true; I know it’s not true It would be almost impossible for Lindsey Graham — given who I am and what I’ve been doing for the last 20 years — not to care about those in harm’s way, who get killed, and not go on to hold the administration accountable that lied about it.   The scumbags are the people in the White House who lied about this.”